There is nothing that I claim to know, other than that I know nothing at all. In no way am I a teacher other than through my actions of continuously trying to be a student. I have no wishes to be glorified, only to be shown the light that is truth. Truth being that which is. Not the right and wrong that we have come to call good and evil. But the "is" that exist because it must. Nothing is here by mistake but on the same token nothing is here on purpose. Things that exist are because they are, and the sooner I understand that the sooner I can move forward. Or backward. Or just move...because in existence there is no direction other than motion. No forward thinking, no regressive behavior. Just actions that cause more to follow, like domino's falling. If there is a god the creator of all, I would say that he is nothing more than the first breathe or thought that started all movement that followed it/him. We see what we believe we see, because we believe that we see it. We are master creators who refuse to take credit for the universes that we manifest. Out of fear that god will appear and punish us for such blasphemy. But each day subconsciously we praise ourselves and smile at the light within us whenever we think god isn't looking. A painter creates a master piece, then signs his name at the bottom. A father sits in the stands and watches his son run 65 yards for the game winning touchdown, and to himself says "that's my boy". "My boy" meaning "that's my creation". But no one would dare say openly that I created all that I see, when technically all we're even seeing are billions upon billions of atoms mushed together and reflections of light that our eyes have taken in and given to our brain which has decoded, processed, and delivered in a means of understanding that somehow makes sense. But that's just fancy talk for saying that we believe in the most impossible things but wont believe in the most simple.
The idea of god is by far the most grand and improbably ideas to date. An entity that sees all, hears all, created all, knows all, and can do any and all things. A being who by most accounts created us out of loneliness and the lack of entertainment. Loves us and wants nothing more than for us to join him in a place called heaven. But he seems to also enjoy a great soap opera, because he also creates evil forces that any good story needs to keep you on the edge of your seats. Evils that will pull you away from him and drag you to a place called hell. A place he doesn't want you to go and has complete power of destroying along with all the "evil" in the universe, but claims that its a test. A test to see what choices you will make on your own with the free will that's he's given you...I just find it a bit redundant for a teacher who already knows every choice that his student will make, to then give that student a test...
It may just be me but this god character sounds more human than god-like. But we'll believe that before we even consider believing maybe we are god, or aliens are god, or even that Zeus is an alien who is god. Why is it that it's perfectly acceptable that a woman had a baby while still a virgin that grew up to walk on water and bring dead things back to life. But the thought that Peter Pan never gets old and uses pixie dust and happy thoughts to fly is preposterous. Why do we accept one with no proof or evidence but deny the other? If the lack of proof doesn't prove existence, why do we speak with such certainty?
I'm on a journey, going where, I don't know. I thought my quest was to find love, then I thought it was happiness and completion in my career. But now I believe that I'm just searching for inner peace. Balance in myself and the ability to breathe on my own, without the need of any outside contraptions. I stopped looking for love a long time ago when I found it and lost it, there's no need for me to search for it anymore because I know where it is and what it looks like. My career is moving in the direction that it needs to be as long as I continue to stay true to my beliefs. But peace, is the one thing that has consistently eluded me. But now it has all my attention. That which you are looking for, is also looking you. I can only hope that peace is out there somewhere in the universe pulled over at the side of the road asking for directions in search of me. And hopefully our paths will cross sooner than later.
I hope that we all can start looking for the things that truly matter and learn to ignore the distractions. We get so caught up on trivial things that hold no greater purpose, we spend hours of our lives looking at other people's lives when our own is a foreign country to us. We love being distracted, misled, and fed on by the monsters that capitalize off of complacency.
Nothing that I have said is any more valid than it is invalid. I have no proof to back up my claims, nor do I need any. Because if proven wrong it will only mean that I've learned something new. Something that will put me that much closer to where it is that I need to be. If I've become distant in personal relationships please don't take offense, just know that hopefully when we reconnect that I'll be better for having taken the time to myself. Because I can't love you if I haven't yet learned how to love that which I see in the mirror properly.
Don't believe in me, that's my job. Believe in yourself, signing off
till next time
stay random
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